AOLics Anonymous

This all started when my boss, a website developer, had a report that a site he'd built was not displaying properly in AOL. Well, his first reaction was "Who the heck still uses AOL?" He was searching for some stats on AOL usage and any known issues with displaying css and other codes, when he came across this blog.

He asked me if I knew anyone who still used it and I replied that I did, as a matter of fact; one close friend and I had just had this discussion, and I was trying to convince her to get away from AOL. He asked what her reason for staying was and I told him she was just afraid of change.

I forwarded the above mentioned blog post to this particular friend and this is how she responded: Here picture this: (I'm standing) "My name is (friend) and I'm an AOL addict." There, that's the start! See, you two planted a seed!! It will grow!! LOL and...... I will make the commitment to change. My husband has tried to bring me into the present and I'm making progress, but as with any addiction, it takes time and patience. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Well, that prompted me to come up with some type of intervention for this friend of mine. I took a look at the AA 12 steps and came up with my own version of steps for what I like to call "AOLics Anonymous" (people addicted to AOL instead of to alcohol).

I hope you will share this list of steps with all the AOLics you know:

AOL Steps

1. We admitted we were powerless over AOL - that our lives had become dependent upon their service.

2. Came to believe that a browser greater than AOL could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our web usage and our internet experience over to the care of IE or Firefox as we understood them.

4. Made a searching and fearless browser inventory of our what’s currently available on the web.

5. Admitted to AOL, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have AOL removed from our computer.

7. Humbly asked AOL to cancel our paid subscriptions.

8. Made a list of all bad habits acquired, and became willing to make amends for them all.

9. Made direct amends to such habits wherever possible.

10. Continued to inquire into new, updated browsers and when we considered AOL promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through Google and Yahoo to improve our internet browsing experience as we understood it, visiting only non-AOL sites.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to AOLics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.


This post is intended to be humorous. It is in no way intended to make fun of the actual AA 12 steps. The author has a healthy respect for AA. It is not intended to be used as sound moral or medical advice. It is simply a blogger's personal sense of humor.